Inner Journey in Inverness

I knew I had to take a trip alone. I mean I came to Edinburgh alone, but this was going to be different. I had made a lot of American friends and was starting to become too comfortable. A lot of people I know are so comfortable with their lives they forget to explore, to learn, to LIVE. I looked up some tickets and decided I was going to take a bus to Inverness and stay for three nights.

I remember the first trip that scared me to death was a solo day trip to NYC. It's an hour and a half train ride from my hometown in New Jersey, but I had never done it alone. I can feel the panic I felt that day, being so choked up and full of fear that I could hardly breathe. I didn't even know what I was afraid of. I think it was mostly the unknown, the worry that I wouldn't find my way, or something "bad" was going to happen. Looking back I realize how ridiculous I was being. It just goes to show you how your own negative thoughts and beliefs can alter the way you feel, and how it can swirl around inside of you and keep you stuck in your old ways if thinking.

I decided to push through and take the trip anyways, I mean I was going to the Metropolitan Museum of art, how could I bail on that. The real root of my hesitation was others beliefs, the fear about traveling that I was taking in as my own beliefs. I could hear other peoples thoughts, "women shouldn't travel alone..New York is a big city..what if you get mugged?.. you can't trust everyone..."

These thoughts weren't mine. At each stop the train took I could feel myself letting go of these fear based thoughts and falling deeper into my own positive thoughts. I realized how downright crazy these stereotypical beliefs were. It was even crazier to realize how easy it is for fear to consume you, if you let it.

I ended up having a great time wandering about the museum. I even had a few people ask me for directions, must have been the certain pep in my step. This day was the opening for more fearless journeys to come. And the thing is, the whole day I never once felt alone.

I booked a mega bus to Inverness, a small city in the highlands of Scotland. I had planned on couch surfing with a couple from Latvia. It was going to be my first time couch surfing alone, and I was a bit nervous. But everything checked out, and I had good had a feeling about where I was staying. When I arrived at the Inverness bus station, my host Maris, offered to pick me up to take me to their house. As soon as I met him I knew there was nothing to worry about. He made me feel comfortable and at ease.

Canal in Inverness

                        

River Ness

Maris and his girlfriend were so accepting, open, and interesting. The first day Maris suggested I go to a cemetery situated on top of a hill to get good views on the city. He said you wouldn't find that on any tourist sites, haha. It was a gorgeous cemetery, not like back home in the U.S. It was a enormous with giant tombstones, and really well kept.

The second day, they lent me their bike so I could bike to a nearby town called Dores, which borders the great Loch Ness. I was so in awe at their trust and openness. I could tell that Maris genuinely loved meeting new people, and had a positive outlook on the goodness of people. It really hit home that I don't have to hold onto to my old beliefs and be so closed off to people.

Biking to Loch Ness was so freeing. It was an absolutely beautiful ride, with rolling hills, stretches of farmland, and sheep. Just flying down the bike path was so amazing and liberating. I felt like I was leaving behind something I didn't need anymore. Arriving at Loch ness felt like such an accomplishment. It was such a mystical place. I enjoyed sitting on a rock letting the wind swirl around me as I soon drifted off to sleep. I awoke to an approaching storm and made it back just in time before the rain hit:). I, however, did catch a picture of three crazy Scots swimming in the lake before I left.

Biking face

Loch Ness!

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On the last day I took Maris's suggestion to hike up to the Kessock bridge viewpoint. He showed me exactly where to go, and even dropped me off at the hostel I was staying at for the last night. It was amazing. I spoke for a few moments to an older Scottish couple who had their young son with them. Standing on top of the hill viewing the bridge and the entire city I had a realization: Life isn't just about the long lasting relationships you hold, but about those brief instances where two paths cross for just a moment in time. You share that moment, and it's in this very second that you realize we are all one and connected by something bigger and more meaningful than us. 


On the walk back to my hostel I took in the views of the bay as the sunset. I came to realize that the beauty in this world is more important than my problems. Sometimes I get so caught up in my head, I forget to just be, or even why I came to Scotland in the first place. To see beauty, live, push myself, and experience new things. I think the biggest theme of this trip for me is comfortableness. It can be a very bad thing, because it turns into monotony, then boredom, then depression. Having curiosity, a thirst for new experience, and the courage to take on the unknown is the foundation for growth, for a fulfilling life. I don't want to settle, I have never been a settler. I want to be fulfilled. Everyone deserves that right.